Sense of the Forest

Nicholas Kitchen (080821)

When I was 14 and 15 I felt so much force from nature. When I stood next to an Oak tree I really felt I was next to a giant pump of energy. I felt it glowing. the forests I would pass by in North Carolina had the rich and mysterious floor of uncountable life activities. I felt it every time I looked into the forest. At breaks at school I would sit out on one of the balcony benches and look at the pure blue of the sky. This flowed into me like water, and every drive I would have a tendency to say "look at those clouds" which did not arrouse much response, except sometimes. I feel somewhat that way now, but what happens in my onw head, the pace of my own activites have made it much more dull. In North Carolina the dense forest that used to be next to our house is now a athletic field. Forests by the road which used to seem endless are now easy to see light through. A lot has changed internally and externally.

I used to see it as so natural when Beethoven wrote about his inspiration coming from nature. Now it seems a bit like a fantasy. I miss that sense of the forest that used to be totally natural to me, Perhaps I will grow to feel something like it again...